Have you ever asked yourself that? Have you ever felt that despite your hard work and progress, that you just aren’t doing enough? You just aren’t good enough? Today I have a confession. Not only have I said that to myself in the past, I still say that to myself on occasion.
Growing up as a fat kid, I used to hear it all the time. “You will always be fat” or “You can’t do anything right” or “You are a fat slob” or worse. Those words floated around in my head until they became a part of me. One of the biggest regrets in my life is that it took me so long to realize what a pile of crap that was.
I was fat. That’s a fact. The rest was all judgement that people had gotten me to believe. I have written this before but I remember hearing Dr.Phil say to someone once “They said that to you 100 times, but you have said it to yourself 100,000 times.”
It can become part of our very fabric and effect every aspect of our lives including how we see ourselves. It is up to us to say to ourselves “I may still be fat, but I am so much thinner than I used to be.” If you are at the start of this journey, you can say “I am fat today but I can do this. I can lose the weight and get healthy.”
Since I joined TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) 4 years ago, I have lost 80 of that 180 pounds. People have started to ask my advice and I have been able to help a lot of people. Since I have started this blog, I have had the chance to speak to a couple of groups about my weight loss journey. They were short talks but from the reactions and comments afterwards, I could tell people were impacted. I have had reactions to my blog and have had people tell me I should consider doing more motivational speaking.”
Despite all this, what was my first reaction? Well I am not there yet. I can’t talk to people about weight loss. They will just see a fat guy on stage and wonder what the heck he is doing talking about weight loss.
What SHOULD my reaction have been? Yeah, why not? I am an entertainer in my “regular” job. I am certainly used to speaking to people, and this is a subject I am passionate about. I know I have been able to help people and I know that I could present it in a helpful but still entertaining way. Oh yeah, and I have lost 180 pounds! I think that makes me qualified.
We are so quick to beat ourselves up, but today I want you to say this along with me. “I am good enough. Fat is what I have, not who I am.” I am not trying to sound like one of those cliched speakers who spout platitudes, but it is so true that we are often our worst critics.
Don’t let what other people have said to you in your past define how you see yourself in your future. You may have to read that line over again. Don’t let all the stuff you have heard in the past from anyone including yourself define how you see yourself in the direction of your life you are now following.
Here’s what you and I both need to do. Erase that tape in our heads. Look at where we are now, at how far we have come and say, “Not only CAN I do this but I AM doing this”
If it is true for you, say “I am eating healthier. I am making better food choices. I am getting some exercise for me. In fact on occasion, I even surprise myself at how well I am doing.”
If you haven’t made those choices yet, then decide today is the day you will still treating yourself the way you deserve to be treated. If you have someone in your life who doesn’t treat you that way, tell them you won’t put up with any more. Tell them if they can’t be positive then they can be quiet.
I am a man of faith. I am a believer in Jesus and that I am a creation of God, and one thing I have learned over the years is that God doesn’t make junk. I may have made some bad decisions in the past about my food, and how I looked after myself, but I have turned that around and am heading on. Do I have regrets? Sure. As I said I regret taking so long to figure it out, but I can’t change the past and neither can you. All we can do is move on from here.
So tomorrow when you start your day, start it on a positive note. Believe in yourself and that you can do this. I have told people this many times over the years but the hardest part of weight loss is the battle in our own heads. Richard Simmons once said “Don’t wait until you lose the weight to like yourself. You will only be a smaller version of the same person.”
If you need to find pictures of you at your heaviest and post them where you can see them, do that. If people tell you how you have done or how proud they are of you, don’t dismiss it. Listen to what they say and take it in. A lot of us have problems accepting compliments because we don’t believe they could possibly be true.
Well let me tell you that you are good enough. People are proud of you and love you and want the best for you. Isn’t it time you were proud of yourself and want the best for you? Today’s the day!
Until next time, have a healthy and happy day!